Where to start ?


I first started picking in my early teens. It was around the age of 11, a family member had already picked my face twice previously till my face was sore and red, and bleeding. The actual first time i picked my own skin was just after that. I didn't realise it was a problem till I started making it significantly worse. I remember, going so deep my skin wouldn't stop bleeding. I remember using my mothers sowing needles and tweezers. I remember seeing 2 or 3 of my family members significantly picking when I was growing up, I remember them focusing in on one area and repetitively pulling/ picking.

Picking itself, I find very hard to talk about. Firstly there is a huge difference between picking the odd spot and doing significant damage to your skin. 


The feelings I had towards my skin then are still the feelings I get now.

such as;


I get significantly irritated by my skin. 

in some sense felt like tearing it off.

A very strong urge

A need to get satisfaction

I felt my skin was dirty.

I felt there was something under my skin that I needed to get out

I felt I had to clean my pores. 

specifically I felt I had to get the bad stuff out.

On edge and generally irritated 

often I felt over heated.

and most importantly I felt I was doing my skin good. (which I was not),